Sunday, 26 June 2011

The One.

The One. Your soul mate. Your second half. The one that completes you. Whatever word you use to describe it, some believe in this "One". The one you are meant to spend the rest of your life with, the one that is supposed to think your thoughts, complete your sentences and know exactly how you want your coffee in the morning. Do you believe in it? Maybe.

I'm quite the optimist and I have always tried to be even though people around me or situations that surround me tend to not be so optimist. I believe in true love. I believe that there is someone out there who will fit perfectly with my personality, my person and that we will love each other for ever. Is it wishful thinking? Today, in the 21st century, is the idea of a true love old school? Some tend to say differently. I do believe one can have many true loves, and each love teaches you something different that will then make you ready for the next true love and so one, until you find that perfect "One".

When life expectancy was 35, one could imagine spending their entire lives with someone because well, they didn't have that much of a long life to begin with. Now, we live till we're 100, and obey to the "death do us part" rule. But is that realistic? People change, and develop and sometimes they just aren't compatible as they were 10-20 years ago. 

Remember, I'm playing the devil's advocate, because I do believe in have that one great person and that it just takes patience. I added a post to my Tumblr account today (and you should check it out, it's daily thoughts that I post.. http//misscourey.tumblr.com), it said: "Patience is bitter, but it's fruit is sweet" - JJ Rousseau, and that's what I believe is the key, is to be patient for the right one to come by and not settling with Mister or Miss Right Now. 

Anyways, as I was saying, should divorce be more accepted? Should we be able to change life partners as we please. This way you can really get a taste of a little bit of everything and enjoy what anyone can offer you. Maybe the possibility of being polygamous sexually could be accepted, for both men and women. I guess I'm saying all this, but don't believe a word of it. I cringe at the thought of people starting to accept open marriages and that the idea of "The One" seems to be a fable that your grandmother read to you when you were a child, that those "Happily Ever After" was just not real and that after the princess rode off with her prince, well the prince found a younger, prettier Snow White and ditched the first Snow White, for her to be back with the 7 dwarfs, taking care of them on her own....

Well damn you "new society". While we're young, we should have all the "fun" we want, enjoy other people and learn what we like and not like. I really do hope that the whole stereotypical married life is shit idea goes away, and that instead of drifting a part or getting on each other's nerves, we learn to grow together and to always keep things interesting, no matter what life throws at us, whether it be babies, work or younger prettier babysitters. I don't believe anything is ever perfect, and of course there are ups and downs, but I do wish that more people can become optimistic. No, I don't see fairies and angels, but I see hope, and love, and I believe in these virtues and ideas. Don't we all want that great "One", the "One" that we can be by our side and that we can conquer the world together....

Ah. it might be wishful thinking. but seriously. even for me in my single situation. I know I will be happily married one day and with that person whom I hope I can call mine forever.

And you... do you believe in the One or is it just a load of BS? Please share. You know. I love your comments!

N.

Friday, 24 June 2011

Summer tunes : Motown Madness

When I think summer, I think Motown. Why is that? Well...I have a cottage, and every time I go (usually in the summer!), my mom has these 3-4 CDs on repeat for the past 3 years now.  The first being Motown Classics, the second being Michael Buble live in Concert, another one is in Spanish, I think it might be Alejandro Sanz, a CD I got her when I was in Mexico at least 15 years ago! Not one second of the day is spent without music playing in the background.

I love Michael, don't get me wrong, but I adore Motown. I think that Montreal also thinks Motown when they think summer. We have been lucky enough to greet Stevie Wonder and Smokie Robinson these past years for the Jazz Festival. I was lucky enough to attend the Smokie concert with my Granny! What a treat! Of course, my mom is the biggest Smokie fan I know and she's the one that made me fall in love with this music. There is really nothing like soul music.

I'm surprised to know that not everyone knows exactly what Motown is, and I guess, they just didn't grow up with parents who were in love with this music. I did. At a very young age, I was introduced to all of music's greats: Marvin Gaye, The 4 Tops, Smokie, Stevie, Aretha, The Jackson 5, The Temptations...need I go on? These artists have become some of my favorite and their songs are printed in my mind forever.  I have ever purchased my own Motown CDs that I love to play when I have guests over, or when I'm cooking up a storm, or when I'm just chilling around in my home. They remind me of summer, of the hot weather, of the water, the sun and all those happy summer moments, so I guess I want to share my love for Motown with you...

Here are 2 of my favorites... and hopefully you will love em and discover the other great  Motown artists and tunes...

Such a summer song!!! (Also part of the Motown Cottage Classics CD!)


I love this song SO SO much. I feel like I was born in the wrong era.


If there are any other Motown tunes you love, please share!!

N.

P.S. You should buy this CD -MOTOWN CD LINK

Wednesday, 15 June 2011

"Wandering"

I was stuck on Jarry yesterday evening, waiting for a friend and in the mean time, trying to find a place willing to give me a quick manicure. My mission failed, no manicure places open or willing to take me so I decided to wonder. To wonder on Jarry between St-Hubert and St-Laurent...I used my little IPod, not some great camera, but I also used the Instagram app, which I love. I love taking pictures and this was a great way to put my passion in to practice. So... I decided that this would be my Summer Project - called "Wondering". I will discover the beautiful streets of Montreal, through the lense of my Ipod. Let me know what you think. Take a look at my first wonder, on Jarry.


SAINT VINCENT FERRIER


The Bowl.


Capitalisme


Tradition


Till death do us part


Going nowhere


Pray


Super guilty


La belle viande


I can't hear you.


Is your doorbell the pink one or the black one?


Apples and Cars


The Hood.


The more things change, the more they stay the same


Summer drinking


Eat

Fido


Move

Hope you enjoyed!

N.


Friday, 10 June 2011

La Bêtise, just mouth-watering..

Im always on the quest to discover new foods in and around the city. I love trying new places, or going back to old places, but trying new dishes, it's like a little passion of mine. Some of my favorites nights have been at restaurants, trying new food, with some great wine and of course great company. Well let me tell you, I discovered quite the gem in this city, called La Betise. 

La Bêtise - Photo courtesy of Lifeofasourgirl.blogspot.com
La Betise is located on St-Hubert corner Bellechasse. You walk in, and they have a beautiful wooden bar with approx 40 seated places. The theme is a little western with the cow like fabric covering each chair. It looks really nice and really cozy. We sit at the bar for a while and talk to the owners. My buddy is a regular and knows the staff really well. As they are chitchatting, I take a look at the menu. WOW. From oysters, to lychee bombs, to General Tao poutine, to Tempura Salmon Tartare. I'm drooling. I guess you can say that the menu is kinda asian tex-mex fusion with comfort food. I just wanted to try everything! They had a selection of 15 tapas, and then 5 main dishes which were actually 5 of the tapas but with fries and salad. 

The salmon tartare with tempura and avocado
I decided to go really all out and ordered 2 tapas - the general tao poutine along the salmon tartare. The 3 others I was with also ordered the salmon tartare, but we also got a delicious entree of guacamole, which was DIVINE. What was special with this guacamole, is that it came with an asian twist - it was topped with fish eggs! Yes those little red ones you see on your sushi! Really creative. My entire dining experience was really enjoyable and I do suggest you give it a try. I even believe that they show the game during hockey season (they had a big Habs flag in the entrance!) 



After spending my entire night, drinking and eating with my friends and owners, we decided that we wanted to make this location the first venue for our 6à10 DRAGON BOAT fundraisers. For those that don't know, I'm also captain of my own I'M ON A BOAT Dragon Boat team that raises funds for the Cedars Cancer Institute. We are 20 on the team. To paddle on race day, we need to raise $10,000 for the cause and to help us, we are organizing these events! So for $20, you get a free drink, free food, discounts on alcohol, a $15 tax receipt AND OF COURSE, a great JULY 6th evening with friends! So come on, encourage us! Bring a friend or 2 or 3. It will be one fun event for a good cause! 

Here is the Facebook event: 

If you want to learn more about the cause we're supporting, check out the official Dragon Boat website: www.cedarsdragons.ca

Here is the address of La Betise, if you want to give their food a try!

6015 St-Hubert, coin Bellechasse
www.labetise.com (the music on the website is really good too!)

Happy Eating and come see us on JULY 6th to support our Dragon Boat team!

N.

Sunday, 5 June 2011

How to be a gentleman?

For a long time now women have fought to be treated like equals, to have the same jobs as men, to be independent, to be strong women who don't need men in our lives to achieve greatness. With all this GIRL POWER we have pushed whether it was the Spice Girls or Beyonce advocating for women to be powerful people just like men, some men have ceased to treat us like ladies, but as their equals, and in this process we have seen that chivalry isn't as important as it was way back when. Funny enough, women still love and want to be treated like ladies, like princesses. We still want to be cared for, looked after, protected and we want our men to stand up for us. It's quite the essence of a woman - we aren't always sure what we want. But all I know is that I want chivalry back, I want a gentleman and all women secretly do.

If your Dad or Mom didn't teach you the ways of being a gentleman, then there is really no other way you could have learned, unless you attended finishing school or a prep school that emphasized the ways a man should be no matter what the society might dictate. So I have put together a list of some of the most loved acts of gentlemaness (I made up that word) according to me.

Let's go through a nice date between a man and a woman, going through the many things a man can do to be a gentleman.

Opening the door for your lady is one of the most loved acts a man can do
First, pick up your lady. There is something about being picked up and driven around that we love. Don't honk, text or call when you are at the door. Get out of your car, go to her door, ring and have her come out. Once she comes out, and you both make your way to the car, do open the car door for her. If you are taking a cab, well then open the cab door. Note to always let your lady walk in first. And this is the golden rule. When walking in to a place, car, whatever, she should always be in front of you. 

Then it's off to the restaurant, once you get there, of course chances are she will probably get out of the car without your help, but do make your way around the car to help close the door and don't start walking towards the restaurant without her. Accompany her. If it's raining, drop her off at the restaurant and then go find parking, if you can't find parking too close to your destination, drop her off. A. A woman can't walk too long in heels and B. It's a nice thing to do. 

Once you get to the restaurant, if she's with you, again open the door for her! And, let her walk in front of you to get to your table. I believe walking behind your lady roots from wanting to protect her. Once you get to the table, you can pull out the chair for her, but to be honest, I don't really care for that. Now, if you are meeting her there for whatever reason, when she arrives, stand up to greet her. I still love when men stand up from their table when a woman walks in. It shows respect. 

When it's time to order, I think that now women like to share their opinion on the wine, on the food and so ask for her ideas. I have to say that when Im in a restaurant, I like to speak. I like to ask the waiter about suggestions and I'm quite vocal on what I want, so you really have to feel what type of woman you are dealing with before making decisions for her. But do show some proactiveness (another word I made up) by either choosing the wine or ordering appetizers. A woman likes her man to be proactive. I do hope you made the reservation for that restaurant too. 

Once done dinner, if it's a first date (2nd or 3rd really), don't have her pay. I know we root for all to be equal, but there is something about a man who pays for his lady that is still sexy and strong. Some men decide to always pay for their lady at restaurants and I like that too. In exchange, women can do other things for their men, by taking them out, buying them gifts, paying for other every day things. This is a very old school mentality of course, but nice to adapt in our current society. 

With dinner done, help her put her coat back on if she had one. This is probably one of my favorite things a man can do. There is something so nice about this simple act. I always felt privileged when my at-the-time boyfriend helped me put on my coat at a group dinner while all other women in couples had to do it themselves. And if you decided to go for ice cream or a walk post-dinner, walk on the dangerous side of the sidewalk, meaning the side where cars pass. This is to prevent from being robbed or hurt. Also if it's cold, a nice thing to do is to offer your jacket to your lady. I love when men do this. And then, if you decide to go straight home, well going to get the car is a nice gesture and once back home, get out, walk her to her door and make sure she is inside and OK. 

Another nice act of chivalry that I didn't mention because it didn't really fit in my story is carrying her heavy things. If she has large bags, boxes, whatever, do offer to help her carry them.

All that I have mentioned above can be adapted to whatever situation you are in with your lady. Open doors, have her walk first, drop her off before finding parking, be proactive, help her take off and put on coat, walk on dangerous side of sidewalk can be done in any situation, whether you are shopping, eating, going to the movies, going to do groceries, these are just some simple acts that go a long way.

Im telling you, if you don't do them, start and I can guarantee that your lady will be happy and feel like the princess she deserves to be! If you have any other acts of gentlemaness to add, please do! Let's help chivalry, it aint dead yet! 

N.

NB. A lot of men I know are still gentlemen and I want to just thank you for being that way! 

Thursday, 2 June 2011

He taught me to be stronger...

I don't usually use personal stories when I talk about my points of view. I generalize. But of course there is always something that I lived through in order to be able to give my own point of view. I guess I'm breaking my own rules for this post. 

I recently decided to cut a very special person out of my life. I made this decision because it wasn't going anywhere and I was fed up with wanting more than he actually did. This whole process took much longer than it should have and instead having it last a couple months, it went past 1 year and a half. Despite all this, he taught me a lot. He taught me about music, about people, about emotions, about dinosaurs, about stocks, about baseball, about values and most and above all, he taught me how to be a stronger woman. He supported me when I first started this blog, in my new job with the magazine, helped me when things with friends weren't doing so well, smiled at me when I needed it, hugged me when I needed it. And in return, I did the same for him with his music, his friends, his job, his future plans and morale. This man became my best friend, and I developed more and more feelings for him as time passed. But quickly realized that he was no where near ready to want to be with me and what I should have done as soon as I saw those red lights was to back off. But I couldn't. I stuck around. I hoped. I saw other women pass through his life, I saw him get closer again with his ex, and I accepted it all. Hoped that one day he would realize what an amazing person I was and that he would be crazy to pass me by. Finally, after 1 year and a half of talking to this person almost every day since Oct 2009, I knew it was time to make the cut. Why it took me so long? My optimism. My heart kept on aching and not that I was ever in love with him, but I always wished he would want me more and that those feelings would eventually develop. This whole experience has taught me so much, and this is really what I care to share with you.

LESSON #1 - I learned to not use a crutch when you brake up with someone. You need to live that pain on your own. See your friends. Go out. But stay away from finding someone who will "replace" that one. This man was my crutch when I got out of my last relationship. Of course, not all situations are the same, but I guess it's important to know you are really ready. I wasn't. And still am not, even though I thought I was. Relationships still give me a little anxiety because Im still dealing with the after effects of my last one. 

LESSON #2 - Keep that chase going. Everyone likes a good challenge. Never open up too quickly. I made that mistake with him. This has hurt me more than once. And most girls I would say are pretty good with this. Well most I know. I give in too quickly and show my emotions when I first get the chance. Have him run after you. Have him want you more than anything. My mom told me, never give in too quickly, you are amazing and you can chose whoever you want. They are lucky to be with you, not the other way around.

LESSON #3. - You are amazing. You are amazing enough to have what you want and we should never settle with something mediocre. I settled for a "friendship" with this guy instead of actually telling him GOOD BYE when I knew that he just didn't share my feelings. Sticking around shows that you just aren't worthy enough. I know now that I'm an amazing person and that the one who will find me will think the same and want the same. Not everything is meant to be. Never underestimate how amazing you are, or compare yourself to others. Im repeating it because I mean it. YOU ARE AMAZING.

LESSON #4. - Listen. Listen to yourself and to the ones that care about you the most. Their advice is priceless.  And you know yourself the best, we shouldn't suppress what our mind is telling us. Sometimes we need to learn things on our own, but I learned how important it is to really listen to the ones that want the best for you. Look at salespeople, who always tell you that everything looks good on you. They don't care about what you look like, they want a sale. Trust your mom that tells you your jeans make you look fat, or in this case, your friends that tell you it's time to move on. Because, chances are, they are right.

LESSON #5. Be self-disciplined. So many times do we tell ourselves: Ok that's it, time to move on, but we catch ourselves talking to that person again, wanting to see them again, wanting to spend time with them again, just to fill that void. We are lying to ourselves. Occupy yourself. Shop. Play Sports. Read. See Friends. and DO ANYTHING to not speak to that person. It will only hurt you in the long run.

LESSON #6 and last lesson. Smile. When times are tough, all you need is a smile. Close your eyes and smile. It's as if nothing can make you unhappy. Time is the best medicine, but it can start with a little smiling.

I'm not the life guru, but before meeting this guy, I didn't put any of this into practice, or barely. He completely changed my ways of thinking when it came to relationships between 2 people. This is how he made me a stronger woman. The most important lesson though is #3. Believe that you are great, no matter who you are. I thank this man for teaching me so much. He taught me more than what he probably bargained for. Who knows what the future will bring, but hopefully it will continue to bring me happiness and confidence to have or do anything I desire and deserve, because above all, that's what I really want in life.

N.